Bahamut
by Melpomene of Tragic Olympus
Summary: Just a little one-shot about two Bahamut riders. Rated M for fowl language.


"LEFT! LEFT! FOR THE LOVE OF ETRO! LEFT!"

Caius Ballad and Oerba Yun Fang had been battling Cie'th since the crack of dawn. The duo had left the city of Paddra to try and locate the missing seeress Yuel before the people of Paddra turned the city into ruins…again. The task was daunting and both warriors weren't exactly thrilled that they were put together for the challenge, but you don't go against orders, especially when you're _paid_ to do so. So, the journey began at sunup. The two warriors, one clad in blue, the other in purple, began their long trek to find the missing oracle, knowing full well they were potentially walking into traps everywhere they went.

What greatly upset the people of Paddra the most was the fact that the warrior from Oerba and the guardian of the oracle couldn't get along to save their lives. They constantly bickered, wished each other to the bottom of various bodies of water, and wished each other numerous times to be forever cursed to become Cie'th food. A wish, both soon found out, that could very well come true if both didn't think of something….._**fast**_. Horde upon horde of Cie'th attacked the duo relentlessly.

"CAIUS ARE YOU DEAF OR JUST STUPID! I SAID LEFT!" Shouted Fang from atop her Eidolon Bahamut, while Cauis stood atop his own Bahamut, scowling at Fang.

"I heard you just fine, woman," hissed Caius as he sliced at the onslaught of Cie'th aiming for his jugular. "Besides, woman, my left or your left?!"

"DOES IT MATTER?!"

"Yes, it does! My left is your right and your left is my right! THERE'S A DIFFERENCE!"

"Oh, fuck you, ball-brain," Fang snorted, slicing off a Cie'th head.

"_Ballad_, woman, _Ballad._"

"Balded?"

"Ball- Oh, never mind, you insufferable twit."

After they eliminated the last of the Cie'th, they sent away their Eidolons and sheathed their weapons, continuing on their destined path in uncomfortable silence. They had only a day more to go before they reached Gran Pulse, where Yeul had last been seen, and somehow, some way, Fang's intuition told her, much to Caius's obvious dismay, that Paddra Nsu Yeul left her village _willingly._ This theory was vehemently verbally incenerated by Caius when Fang brought it up during their trek.

"No way in Etro's name would she abandon her people and her duties willingly," he snorted.  
"She knows what her place is in the universe and she never strays."

"Oh fuck the universe," Fang hissed.  
"You mean to tell me that if you were stuck in the same damn routine day after fucking day that you wouldn't feel the need to rebel from it, even for one day?"

The glare on Caius's features told Fang all she needed to know.

"You're such a stick-ass, Caius," Fang hissed, rolling her eyes.

"And you're an insufferable twit with a bad hairdo," Caius smirked, watching Fang's eye twitch.

"You're one to talk, you mouth-breathing eggplant," she said, raising her eyebrows at him.

"Oh really? Blueberry stick."

"Grape-hued horse's ass."

"I'll have you know," Caius shouted, "Purple is considered a color of royalty."

"It's also the color of chocobo poop," Fang retorted, reveling in the anger growing behind Caius's eyes.

"Chocobo poop is green, you adle-brained twit," he hissed.

"And you'd know this how?"

"Lady Yeul has a chocobo pen. I clean up after them," he muttered under his breath.

"I guess she hasn't gotten ahold of any of Vanille's yet," Fang chuckled.

"Why would she?"

"Oh, nevermind."

That night, they stopped. Caius decided he would hunt down dinner while Fang set up camp. Fang rolled her eyes as she sat up her tent, then moved to set up Caius's tent. When she was finished, she unrolled his sleeping bag at the entrance and went about making a campfire, humming softly to herself as Caius returned with a double armful of fish. Seeing the tents and the fire, Caius had to admit to himself (just not to Fang) that he was somewhat impressed.

As they roasted fish over the fire the silence between them grew more and more awkward. Nether of them wanted to let up and speak first, hoping to make the other crack. But, stubborn as they were, fate was the clear winner and Caius was the unfortunate soul to break the silence.

"What is wrong with that redheaded friend of yours?"

"Vanille? What do you mean 'whats wrong with her'?"

"Why does she act so...weird?"

"She's not weird, she's just...hyper. Child-like. Innocent."

"She has a boyfriend you know."

"Yeah, I know. Never tells me who it is though. How'd you know?"

"She told Yeul, and Yeul tells me everything," Caius said with a shrug.

"Uh-huh...so you're basically Yeul's girlfriend," Fang chuckled.

"I am not. Not in the way you mean it, sicko."

"I was teasing you, you uptight eggplant."

"Ok, I've had enough of the name calling. Let's end this right now. You vs me. Winner gets both Bahamuts."

The low growl emitting from Fang's throat was all the answer Caius needed. Both warriors assumed fighting stance, and summoned both Bahamuts to their stead. Both warriors attacked with everything they had, the sky alight with the blazing of blasts between the behemoth beasts. The battle raged on for several hours until both warriors heard a shrill whistle emitted over the charge of blasts. Ceasing fire, the warriors descended from their respective creatures, only to come face to face with a confused Yeul and a slack-jawed Vanille.

"What on Cosmos's green Earth are you doing?" Yeul asked as Vanille's jaw finally re-hinged.

"Lady Yeul, the Lady Fang and I were having a battle of Eidolons to prove one's dominance over the other," Caius said, glaring daggers at Fang, who was busy trying to see if Vanille had gained the ability to talk yet.

"Goodness," said Yeul as she turned to the red-head next to her, "Vanille, I guess you were right."

"Right about what?"

"Vanille told me that there had been some strong repressed emotion from you and my guardian, and I must admit, I was skeptical at first," Yeul admitted, stringing together a necklace made of daises and lacing them around Fang's neck.

"Yup," chirped Vanille, descending from shock.  
"My point was proven. I told Yeul that it wouldn't be long before Caius showed you his Bahamut," she giggled, waggling her eyebrows at her fellow Oerban.

"Showed me his... _Oerba Dia Vanille, you'd better run and I mean __** NOW!**_"

"Oh shit," Vanille yelped as she broke into a run with Fang on her heel.  
"Cosmos, Etro, Yeul, Caius, _somebody_..._**HEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPP**_!"

An even more confused Yeul turned to face her guardian.

"Did you really show Fang your Eidolon?"

Caius wanted to facepalm.

"I don't think she was referring to that, Lady Yeul."

-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c -c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c -c-

A/N: This was a bit of a rushed ending and SO not the way I planned on this to go, but...Muses are a funny thing.

Anyways, let me know what you think.

All Final Fantasy characters are propety of their rightful owners. I dont own a single one. Just the story idea.


End file.
